The following rather provocative short is an excerpt from my book Jigs & Tales of Bawdry, the ebook version of which will be FREE on Amazon from Wednesday, May 3, through Sunday, May 7. Download your copy today and please remember to rate and review the book on Amazon, Goodreads, and BookBub.
The phone rang sometime after 2:00 a.m.
“Hello?”
“Is this Mike?”
“No.”
“Who is this?”
“Seth.”
“Where’s Mike?”
“Who’s Mike?”
“Mike doesn’t live there?”
“No.”
“Oh.” The feminine voice paused and then asked: “Well, what are you doing?”
“I was sleeping,” said Seth. “Who is this?”
“Cheryl.”
“I don’t know any Cheryl.”
“That’s OK. Do you want to talk to me?”
“I am talking to you,” said Seth. “Wait, what do you mean?”
“I mean, do you want to talk to me?”
Seth was a bit confused. “Uh…”
“You know, talk to me,” explained Cheryl.
“I’m not sure.”
“Come on, tell me what you would do if you were here.”
Seth was still not certain about what to say.
“Tell me what you would do to me,” persisted Cheryl. “Come on.”
“Oh,” said Seth. “Uh…,” he began.
“Yeah, come on,” said Cheryl, breathing heavily.
“Uh, OK, I guess I would touch you?”
“Yeah, good, where?”
“I don’t know. Where do you like to be touched?”
“Don’t ask me. Just tell me.”
“OK, sorry. I’m touching your bottom, I guess?”
“What?”
“I’m touching your bottom. I switched to present progressive to make it more realistic.”
“Say ass.”
“What?”
“Say ass, not bottom.”
“Oh, yes, of course. I’m touching your ass.”
“Good,” said Cheryl. “What else?”
“What else?”
“Yeah, what else? You’re touching my ass and what else?”
“I don’t know. What else do you like?”
“Stop asking me! Just tell me!”
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